Going to post this here til Ed. In Chief Gary Carl gets situated for the holidays and can put it up on The New Obsessive Blog; He spent 5days in a French airport under military guard waiting for a flight during blizzards!! Talk about Yuletide in Hell...
Multimedia supplements to Issue 12 include:
Creative Conference Winter 2010 Pyro Display
and
"Cabin Fever"
edited by David Turpin
Artists Gary Farrelly and Peggy Clydesdale interview critically acclaimed Irish artist/songwriter/performer David Turpin from the churning chlorinated brew of American independence that is the Fraternal Order of the Eagles swimming pool in Dallas, Texas on July 4th, 2010.
Clydesdale Which came first, the poetry, the music or the art. And which is the dominant form?
Turpin I can’t really remember, but I think the art-form I was
interested in first was probably filmmaking. I was drawn into pop music
because it’s a rangy beast that also includes literature, visual art,
photography, typography, and graphics. Whatever I’m doing, I like to
believe that my work is dominated not by form, but by the mode of the
Turpinesque.
Farrelly It is obvious that global cultural conquest is your raison d’etre. Which form will you achieve this by?
Turpin I’ve always been described as a performance artist or a
conceptual artist, despite the fact that conceptual art is probably the
only art form in which I have never practiced. So I expect I will
achieve global conquest for a misnomer. That’s all right, though. I
don’t mind what people call my work, as long as they feast on it until
their bellies burst. Many is the luscious buffet that must endure the
tag of “All You Can Eat”.
Farrelly When do you expect this process to be complete?
Turpin The process is an ongoing one. There will always be
savages somewhere in the world who do not grasp the concept of the
Turpinesque, and my life’s work is to enlighten them – forcefully.
Farrelly What are the key projects you are investing your energies in over the coming 12 months?
Turpin My plans are secret at the moment, but be assured that my dance card is full.
Farrelly Can you give me 7 key words you think best describe your aesthetic.
Turpin Turptacular. Turpnotic. Turpifying. Turpmantic. Turpincholy.
Clydesdale Olfactory sense can elicit the most vivid memories.
In your experience what is the most disturbing memory that evidences
itself upon a certain smell?
Turpin Well, sexual assault certainly has a musk all its own,
but in the interests of maintaining the proper Sunday Colour Supplement
tone, I’ll choose something from further back. Certain tobacco smells
remind me of my piano teacher, who was a very brilliant man, but also a
very frightening one. He smoked like an industrial chimney, and when he
shouted it always burst out of him in a puff of smoke, as if he
literally was a dragon. He sat behind me, so all I ever saw was the
little pieces of ash that drifted down onto the keys. Maybe that’s why
there’s so much incineration in my music.
Clydesdale Loss and struggle are characteristic themes of
American country and western music. Your output also deals with these
basic human tribulations. What would the chorus of a David Turpin
country and western song (produced for the masses on this side of the
Atlantic) sound like?
Turpin It will be saccharine and string-led. Kris Kristofferson
will play guitar, and we’ll use his face as a skiffle board. It will
have harmonies by the Parton-Harris-Ronstadt Trio, and the refrain will
include the lines “I dug up those chalky bones, Theo / To dance in line
like the corn we grow...”
Farrelly Do you believe in God?
Turpin Not necessarily as a benevolent force.
Farrelly Do you believe in love?
Turpin [Declines to answer]
Clydesdale In a recent correspondence you stipulated that
"everything is better with a horse in it" can you please make known
your favorite culinary dish improved by the inclusion of a horse.
*Horseradish does not count?
Turpin I imagine the speared corpse of an enemy – dragged
Hector-and-Achilles-style across the ground by a horse – would taste
pretty nice.
Farrelly Your recent album Haunted was well received by the
critical establishment. Are you satisfied by the wholeheartedness of
their adoration of Turpin?
Turpin I wouldn’t recognize adoration if it walked up to me and punched me in the face. It’s not even on my radar.
Farrelly Where will David Turpin be in 5 years? (at least one scenario please).
Turpin On July 4, 2015, I will be the sole resident in a luxury
hotel at the centre of a wood north of Bear Mountain in upstate New
York. I will be in the Vermillion room, possibly reclining with my
hybrid wolves, watching through the picture window as the people of the
township tie themselves to fireworks and, in my honor, blast off into
the night sky.
(July 4, 2010)
Here's issue 8, Springtime in Hell Edition, edited by me during my website meltdown. Was never previously posted:
featuring:
When Pliosaurs Attack:::::::Murderous Gangs of Swine Meat Justice::::::::::Fully Nude Military Regalia
Meat Judging:::::::::::U Draw Andy!::::::::::::Delicious Holiday Recipe with Bonus Pumpkin Caviar Bisque
Featuring many interesting and varied flights of fancy:
Pied Piper was a pedo!
OCD hits IT!
TV Test Signal Image!
Ode to Megalonyx!
Fringe Anti-Turpin Groups Squelched!
Diplomacy reaches Lofty highs!
Plus a picture of me with a perm in 1990. Thanks, Gary...
Not a lot of things make me feel better about the stupid choices I've made over the years, but these two junkies always, always do. God bless 'em. You may not know them if you aren't a rampant Anglophile like I am: Pete Doherty was in a semi-popular band called "The Libertines" quite a few years ago, and is more famous in the US for wooing Kate Moss for awhile before he screwed it up by nailing some third rate runway model. Amy Winehouse - well, if you don't know who she is, you need to get out more. She is the saddest to me - God is she talented. He, on the other hand, seems to be mostly interested in standing next to and leeching from women who are more famous and talented than he'll ever hope to be.
Winehouse has famously been on a drug fueled spiral to the grave pretty much ever since she became a worldwide celebrity (her husband landed himself in jail recently, which didn't help I suppose). Then again, nobody paid attention to her before she was famous, so maybe this behavior is pretty typical for old Aim. I can't imagine she wrote those great songs when she was as plastered as she always seems to be in the tabloids. Doherty just got released from jail for the umpteenth time (drug charges, in every case) and somehow made himself a fixture next to Winehouse as of late. That must be handy, since she has millions of pounds, drugs a poppin', and photographers en tow 24-7. He must really hate all that about her. Because he's such a private, down to Earth sort of gent.
Anyway, her handlers say that the boils on her face are from a particularly bad case of impetigo (a virus usually seen in children, from what I understand) and NOT shooting meth boiled up with water from the toilets of crack houses in London. But, whatever. Pete seems to have picked up a dose of "impetigo", too.
Oh, and guys... way to perpetuate jokes about British dentistry for decades to come. Invest in a tooth brush. No, really.
Sources:
http://thesuperficial.com/2008/05/amy_winehouse_and_kids_what_co.php?bfm_index=7
http://www.wwtdd.com/post.phtml?pk=6412
